B. A. D. Reviews
B. A. D. Reviews
Conclave
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Conclave is a film I should love. It’s directed by Edward Berger, whose 2022 version of All Quiet on the Western Front took my breath away. Its situation has inherent dramatic potential: the sequestered meeting of Roman Catholic bishops to elect a new pope. It is filled with actors I love: Stanley Tucci (in his worst role in years), Isabella Rosellini (you’d never guess from the way this film wastes her talent that she’s been doing such wonderful work on her own for a decade), and Ralph Fiennes (whose lack of an Oscar needs to be remedied as soon as possible). It takes place in the Vatican—one of the most beautiful places in the world! It’s on an ecclesiastical topic. It all lines up.

Until you watch the film fritter away all of that potential as a slow but sure drift reveals that it isn’t interested in these characters after all. Fiennes manages to hold on to his character the longest, simply because he has the most screen time. But everyone else dissolves into placards. Perhaps they should have saved money on actors and just set signposts in each seat reading “Generic good-hearted African bishop”, “Bishop who hates gay people and women”, and “bishop who just wants to love everyone by putting in place ‘common sense’ policies”. (YES, those are dripping with sarcasm!)

Although Conclave never reaches DaVinci Code heights on the eyeroll meter, it gets too close for my taste. Worse: it’s simply not an interesting movie. Sure, the score is lovely, but why should that be the impression I’m left with? Because everything else is so mediocre. And yet, this film is on all Top Ten lists of 2024. I can only surmise that this is a case of a movie being celebrated for coming to the “correct” political conclusions. We always have one or two, but that this was one of them was especially disappointing.

For those who don’t mind spoilers (like, information revealed in the final five minutes spoilers), I will record a short audio review addressing the film’s ending.

ADDENDUM: Yea, I know: they’re cardinals. I caught it right after I posted, but I didn’t want to record the audio again.

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